changes that are needed in my life!

I am under a great sense of conviction right now. It hurts to feel this way, but I have to be honest and say it feels good too b/c it has been awhile since I have felt this way! I am lazy. There I said it. Too many times I neglect what I should be doing for what I desire to do. Nothing can ever compensate for the neglect of my duty to my sons.  As a mother, in many different areas, I have failed. I look at my son and question, “why is he like this? or why does he do that?”  like it has no direct correlation to my actions. I forget to look atmy heart and its motives.  All to often I allow Asher to see me angry and in that moment I am teaching him to react to situations like I have. He does have a temper, but so do I! He hits and reacts to others aggressively, but how many times have I punished him out of frustration and anger?  He mimics EVERYTHING Dave and I do.  Many times our kids can be an honest look into our own hearts and lives. I will be the first to admit that I do not know what I am doing half the time. I need to take some urgency and find out.

Things I hope to change as of today!

•  Never punish out of anger or frustration, or without praying with them first. (Physical training must come before moral training, in my opinion.)
• Give my time to them joyfully when at all possible
•  Seek to edify others with my words, especially their father.
•  Be content with the basics of life and do not put my own energy into things that have no eternal value. ( If my boys ever cry or throw a fit for something, for that very reason they cannot have it.)
•  Make my children my confidential friends. Meaning, give them the freedom to always share their thoughts, feelings, and dreams with me without judgment and shame.
•  Work harder everyday on my own relationship with Christ, b/c my example will be more influential in their lives than my rules and precepts.
•  Always remind myself that they are not mine…they belong to Christ!!!

steamy

Finally!!!!! Asher went pee in his potty last night, after I poured warm water on him. He was so proud of himself. I was relieved after days of nothing. The only problem is he wants the warm water every time. I can see him at 30 still doing this. Oh well! On a different note, I was trying to get him to poop in his potty this morning and he started to cry and said he was scared. I felt bad so I let him put a diper on to poop. Then a couple minutes later he came up to me very serious and said “mom, my poop is too hot.” To which I infomed him that is comes out that way but it will cool off. So he then proceeded to blow on his diper. Kids are really weird sometimes.

greener grass?

Sometimes I really struggle with my thoughts that try and lead me to believe that I am not everything I could be or as successful because I am a stay at home mom. I look at many of my friends who are in the career times in their lives and often I compare myself to them in a negative way. While they are out there being nurses, teachers, and grad students, I am busy with boo-boos, colors, and papers of my own. So then I ask myself, if being a mother to my two boys is not fulfilling enough then what is? In my heart the answer is nothing! The grass is always greener huh? Everyday of my exsistence, mediocre to some, is a day of firsts and revelations. Everything is new and I am seeing it again through someone else’s eyes. Trees are much more interesting when your baby is  studying them, and monsters become more real when you are running away from them with your 2 year old. At the end of everyday I feel an accomplishment by not only just surviving but by embracing a time in my life, that once gone, can never be experienced or replicated again.

9 months old!

Yes it is true, my little baby is already on his way to being a year old. He has changed alot physically but is still the easy-going, happy, and content person he has been since birth. Thank God! He rolls everywhere, sits up, waves and says bye-bye, feeds himself real food, and laughs at everything his old brother does. He is 20.5 lbs and 29 inches long, has 7 teeth, and sports a faux-hawk and a binkie wherever he goes. He still has no intrest in crawling. Oh well… he will when he is ready. He has brought us so much joy and he makes me want one more baby…but not right now!!!!!!! I love you Silas Vetiver Reese!

much obliged!

David has been gone these past five weeks at probation training in Sacramento, meanwhile I became a single parent…ok that is a bit dramatic but at times it sure felt like that! As a result of him being MIA, it has made me so grateful for the man he is and how much he does help me out with the boys. So this blog is dedicated to my sweet husband (most of the time)!!!! I love you!

 

P-O-T-T-Y Party

 

So we are trying once again to get Asher out of dipers! The two times prior were completely unsuccessful due to the fact he doesn’t mind sitting in his poop and pee. He still could car less, but I decided to stick him in underwear instead of pull-ups and he has taken notice that it feels “yuckies” when you are wet. YAY! I walked out of the bathroom today while he was sitting on his potty and he thought I was gone so he stood up kicked the potty said “silly potty” and then sat right back down on it. It was funny b/c that is totally Asher’s personality.  He has gone poop once and pee three times today…in his underwear…oh well. I hope he is able to catch on soon. If you have trained a child to use a potty and have good ideas PLEASE let me know!!!

Vacation in a Nutshell

For the past 3 weeks, the boys and I have been on vacation, if you can call almost 40 hrs in a van a vaction, but a vacation nonetheless. We drove all the way to Cody, WY, where I was born, to have a family renunion/50th Anniversary party for my Grandparents. It was such a blast to see all my cousin and aunt and uncles again, some of who I had not seen in almost 10 years!!! Asher loved running around everywhere and Silas enjoyed the constant attention…I don’t think he sat by himself the whole time. I got to go white water rafting with my cousins and then we all went to a Rodeo.  Asher was truly disturbed by this experience, not sure why.  We also spent a day in Yellowstone Park, so beautiful, where we saw a wolf, a black bear, elk, and tons of “buttalos” as Asher called them.  Asher also got to see “Old Faithful” geyser, which he keeps talking about to this day…”see the water in the sky…high?” he keeps asking me.  I am glad my family got to meet my boys and we were able to share such a special time together. Here are some pictures in no particular order…enjoy!